Tuesday, March 04, 2014

She makes me want to be a better person.

I don't know about the rest of you, but while I strive for the light I'm well aware that's driven by a moral compass that is often doing its best to not get sucked in by the darkness. I was thinking about the phrase "she makes me want to be a better person" and realized that it has a counterpart; "she makes me want to be a worse person." You know, the situations where all of your darker desires and less ethical reasoning seems to flourish when within a particular person's orbit. And is it really an absolute station? Sometimes we need to be a worse person, or at least acknowledge the light isn't for everyone. It's a choice, really.


It's taken me a long time, and while I love the girls who make me a worse person I think I finally understand that, at my core, it's the one that makes me want to be a better person because my deepest satisfaction—and believe me, this surprises me as much as you—comes when I prove up to that task.

I'm not always up to that task, I know that, but I keep trying. And lately, it doesn't feel like a struggle; it feels natural. And that makes me think maybe, just maybe, I'm becoming a better person.

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