Scary, like shaky scary.

So it’s official, my dad has esophageal cancer. I’m going in with him and my mom and my brother to meet with an oncologist tomorrow so right now my family and I are just kind of operating in a haze as we gather what information we can. I did some research and one of the warning signs that you may be at risk is the indigestion and stomach problems I’ve been dealing with for years so you can bet your sweet ass I’m getting myself into a doctor and getting some pix taken of my insides as quickly as I can.

As for my dad, I’m just crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. A lot of the literature out there seems to indicate there are numerous methods of treatment. Unfortunately most people don’t catch the tumor until it’s rather large so the rate of survival seems low, but when I was picking up my dad from some testing last week the doctor said the tumor seemed mostly contained with only a portion spreading outside his esophagus and while it was larger than any physician would like to see it wasn’t massive either. One thing he said that chilled me was that part of the tumor was resting against a main artery and had it broken into the artery wall it would probably be inoperable…luckily it hasn’t.

So between the long week of trade show craziness and this weighty situation one might say I’m running on batteries badly in need of a charge. I feel a bit like a zombie, just going through the motions and counting down the days until I can unplug from the corporate world for a few day, recharge and come back with a more positive attitude. I’m heading to Bloomington/Normal, IL tomorrow night to see Rockit Girl and American Cosmonaut and to visit some old, and unfortunately long neglected, friends from my early college years. Hopefully the visit to the oncologist earlier in the day will reveal information that might allow a bit of hopeful celebration. At least that’s what I’m hoping for.