Friday, March 04, 2005

He’s back!

Naked Guy at the Gym on his Cell Phone™ (though he wasn't actually naked for the most part this time, just unbelievably annoying) was back yesterday morning! I mean jay-zus what is wrong with this cat? Not only was he jabbering away but he had gym bag draped over six benches and he decided to use a locker right next to the one I was already stationed at thus insuring maximum annoyance would be dished out and weathered by yours truly.

I decided to eavesdrop a bit – well I didn’t have much of a choice since this guy was pretty much right on top of me talking in my ear – but I have deduced that he either sells real estate or rents out apartments. He also doesn’t seem all that well educated judging by his word choices and constant lapses in tense.

Having noticed that I began to wonder if in fact my observations of this lout made me a bad person and indicated that I may be in some way biased along class lines. Then I realized this jerk probably couldn’t even spell “lout” so the point was moot. Then I realized I wanted to punch him because if some boorish jackass thinks it’s appropriate to pace a locker room naked barking into a cell phone I can only imagine what kind of a driver he must be when he gets behind the wheel of his car that is probably small, red and a desperate attempt to impress the ladies.

What makes this even worse is that I belong to a pretty nice gym that has a lovely little juice bar/cyber café that has plenty of room for someone who wants to hang out and make calls on their cell phone. Not only is there lots of room but you can enjoy a healthy frosty beverage and check your e-mail too! So why the fuck do people insist of yammering away in a locker room where space is at a premium and manners matter?

I’m sorry but unless you’re a doctor or the pope I don’t think you are so important that you MUST take that call right this second.

UPDATE at 6:52am I sent an e-mail to the gym's owner yesterday and just got a response letting me know that the issues I brought up had been troubling the management for a while and that from this point on cell phone use would be banned in the locker room. Did I mention how much I love my gym? At the same time, how sad it is that in this day and age gym patrons are so clueless and self-involved that I actually need to petition for the right to a little civility in the locker room? Maybe it's just my nature since I'm also one of those guys who will put weights that are lying on the floor back in their place because I wouldn't want someone to think that I did it.

Does that make me overly-sensitive? I certainly don't want to become one of those whining and nagging types trying to "improve everyone's surroundings" by making their lives miserable with restrictions.
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Who has the time to do this kind of thing?

I totally stole this from John:

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Weekend plans?

So far it's looking to be rather quiet and suffused with family though perhaps I will get out for a biut on Saturday to let off a little steam at InnJoy. If I make it out, is anyone else in? We could all look like this (click on the picture to enlarge so you don't strain your eyes foo'!):


Only we wouldn't be dressed as nicely.
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Who's that in the mist?

Screw American Idol since that show has sucked ever since Kelly Clarkson took it all in the first season. Instead may I direct your attention here for a bona fide talent search helmed by the crew pictured below. Wouldn't you rather be judged by 2D instead of some clueless music industry has-been?


Now that's rock and/or poppin'¹ roll.

¹Speaking of poppin'...I hear that popping your collar is all the rage these days. is this true? Have we re-entered the hell that was the mid-80s Preppy craze? If so, I'd like to let everyone who is doing this know that I was there the first time around and it wasn't cool then so it certainly isn't cool now. Get a clue kids...pick up the retro trends that make sense!

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