Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Tankboy looks tough, but is in fact a big softy.

Nothing upsets me more than seeing people I love being upset. For instance yesterday I get a call from Photogal telling me that her license has been suspended because the State of Indiana took over a month to process paperwork on a ticket she paid ages ago. Then she gets a letter from the City of Chicago telling her the fine connected to a parking ticket she was disputing had just doubled since the City didn’t process her dispute quickly enough.

Now in both of these instances Photogal had all of her paperwork in order and submitted well before any deadlines because, well, that’s just the way she is. She’s the complete opposite of me in that regard. You’ve probably met very few people as organized or as on top of things as Photogal is...so when two gross bureaucratic malfunctions ambushed her in the same day she was noticeably upset.

I hate the impotent feeling that rises whenever someone close to me is deeply distressed about anything. I mean I can lend an ear, offer a shoulder, agree and support their position as much as is vocally possible but after all that there’s nothing I can actually do to remove the feeling of helplessness some situations engender in the victim. I want to suck the poison from their soul and swallow it as my own because, by my reckoning, I will handle it…and if I can’t, well, then it’s better that I’m the one suffering rather than a loved one.

I don’t always respond to other’s emotions terribly well since I can veer wildly from saying all the right things to hopping around on one foot because the other is stuck firmly in my mouth. At the base of it, though, I actually feel an enormous empathy for almost all people, but especially for those close to me.

Now superimpose that on the fact that I spent many, many years of my late ‘teens and early-twenties trying to convince people I was a slightly malevolent genius functioning on a slightly high plane of existence – hey, who in College doesn’t think that? – and you can see the irony within.

Luckily for Photogal, the license situation straightened itself out in-between the time it took her to get off the phone and actually walk down to the DMV to complain in person. The paperwork had gone through and it was proven she wasn’t at fault. I’m sure the situation with the City won’t be as easy to navigate, nor does it hold a resolution that will exactly be in her favor, but at least I’ll be there to try and do whatever I can to lessen the sting.

Do you think if I learned how to make balloon animals that would help?

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