Conflicted.

Conflicted.

Hm, that title just sort of popped up. I realize I wanted to write along that theme, but I also realize this is not the correct forum. This site has gone through a number of cycles, hasn't it? At the outset it was primarily chronicling my pop culture addictions and serving as a platform for some music criticism so I could stretch outside the freelance gigs I had. Then donewaiting came along and most of my music content migrated there, while this space got more experimental. Then I got a day job, Photogal moved in, and things calmed down (for the most part, although I remember her being slightly upset when I talked about her dancing around in her underwear one day ... but that's as scandalous as it got).

Now I'm at another off juncture. Almost all my pop culture writing goes into Chicagoist. I can't really write about my social misadventures here because, well, to be honest, it just doesn't feel the right right thing to do right now. So where do I go?

Hm. Honest answer? I'm not sure. But I've found this forum invaluable as far as keeping the mental gears cranking. Having somewhere that you MUST provide content for 5-7 days a week really helps keep the juices (cliché!) flowing. Between the 9-to-5, band, work, the social life, DVDs, reviewing music, (right now) packing and rearranging my life in general, my time is obviously at a premium, and the first thing that would usually fall by the wayside would be the writing. Luckily, between here and Chicagoist, I can't allow the writing to atrophy. And that keeps me grounded, in the end. It provides a consistent base that I can use to anchor me even in the wildest times.

So what does that mean to you? I'm sure you're thinking, "Well, that's all well and good,* but what's in it for me?" And my answer is, the same thing that's in it for you now. If you've been a longtime reader, these changes have probably been barely noticeable. If you're a newer reader, you know no other Tankboy, right? It's only if you went back in the archives and dug around a bit that you would even know there has been shifting tones around these parts.

And that's perfectly O.K., right? Back in the day I would flutter my eyelashes at, and opine about, Kelly Clarkson on the original American Idol. And I would talk about drunken adventures stumbling around New York (many of which would act as an odd precursor to that whole avalanche of NYC bloggers that tumbled across the internets a few years ago). Heck, at the beginning I had no idea how to even post a photo on here!

I'm rambling, aren't I?

Anyway, this was an incredibly obtuse way of saying I can't always write about the things I want to write about here, but I'm thankful you're still reading the things that I do write about.

And that, my friends, is how you turn a simple one sentence sentiment into a long, drawn-out, exhausting post.

NOTE: As usual, the photo has nothing to do with the post, but Jesus, doesn't Donna Balls look so freaking happy?

*In real life, peaople say that. "Well it's all well and good." Sure it looks a little redundant in print, but read it out loud. Really. Do it now. I'll wait ... see? Doesn't it actually sound natural. And how did I do that. By virtue of my craft!