Unleashed Round Two!

Well, Photogal is out of town for the second weekend in a row visiting her brother and nieces on the Jersey shore (apparently New Jersey doesn’t have beaches, only shores.) What does this mean? Lots of booze and women for Tankboy. Ahahahahahahahaaaa!

Okay, maybe not so much with the women.

Anyway, last weekend there was nothing to do while she was out of town and this weekend there is waaaay too much to do! Sonic Youth and Guided By Voices are playing a fucking street festival tonight. Then The Webb Brothers are playing with my friends in Office later on.

Tomorrow a co-worker of mine is having a party. It’s kind of a yuppie party that I usually wouldn’t frequent but he had a bash earlier this summer and I had a blast. Lots of booze, lots of pretty girls, a power outage, hot fireman for Photogal to gawk at, DJ iPod in the hizouse. I’m gonna try and get Rudy and few of my rock boys and girls to go. Then later in the evening Gina from Rockit Girl is doing a show at The Pontiac for me with her boyfriend Josh from BITCHBECOOL. And then I’m going to catch Nash Kato at Double Door in a quickly arranged show to make up for the missed date at that street festival a few weeks ago. It’s good to live in Chicago sometimes.

I was going to go off on a rant about road rage and asshole drivers but now that I’ve typed the above and realize what a kick-ass weekend I’m in for I just don’t have the heart.

Lights out, poke poke poke your eyes out.

My brother lives with his wife in Toronto, maybe I should give him a call and make sure no one’s looted his apartment yet. Seriously, I lived without power a few years ago for about a week due to a fire at a ComEd station here in Chicago and I can attest to the fact that no power in the middle of the summer equals one sucky situation. I hope everyone on the Eastern seaboard and our neighbors to the north are doing okay. I heard Detroit has a dusk to dawn curfew to curb temptation for those who might bend the law. Scary.

A fever dream.

Thousands of years from now people will walk around with relics of me in little glass jars around their necks saying, "Oh Saint Tankboy, who slew the mighty Maxim/Stuff/Gear dragons and saved women from the peril of the hairy beasts known as twentieth century males, we pray to yooooooou."

I hope you enjoyed my Fair And Balanced views today.

Take that you fucking excuse for a news network.