I am way too old for this.

I literally haven't had to deal with a situation like this since I was a teenager and it's really pissing me off.

I briefly dated -- more like hung out with -- a girl about a year ago. She was cool and we parted on amicable terms…which was rather remarkable since I suspect the reason she lost interest in me was due to my acting like a drunken lout one particular evening. You'd be surprised how many nascent relationships I botch that way since I think it's some sort of self-sabotage I inflict upon myself...but I’m getting off the subject.

Anyway this girl happened to have an ex-boyfriend in a local band and at the time I was booking a club full-time so, as a favor to the girl (and because the band wasn't all that bad) I gave them a few shows. As time went on I gave the band even more shows in bigger clubs when I went independent but for the purposes of this story all you need to know is I briefly dated a girl and because of my relationship to that girl her ex's band got one of their earlier shows in their career.

I recently was having a discussion with a friend of this band's and mentioned the events that lead me to work with them in the first place. Innocent enough I thought.

Today I get a scathing e-mail from the girl I briefly hung out with asking me why I would tell people that I "fucked and ditched" her! Now since we never really did anything more than a bit of making out you can imagine that this caught me by surprise and it's pretty obvious that the guy I was recently talking to -- who I don't really know all that well -- is either some kind of psychotic asshole who enjoys fucking with people or just an incredibly terrible yet imaginative listener prone to aural hallucinations. Either way I'm pretty pissed.

The most distressing thing is that people that know me well also know that I would never, ever refer to a past relationship with a girl in terms as crude as the ones attributed to me...no matter how poisonous things may have gotten between me and a girl I just simply wouldn't speak that way about someone I was involved with in any way.

Believe you me when I say I'm going to enjoy asking the guy who started this whole thing just how he was able to interpret "hung out with and booked her friend's band" to mean "fucked and ditched the girl." You just do not say things behind my back because a) they will get back to me and b) I will call you on it and c) I am really unpleasant when I'm pissed...and I don't like being unpleasant. It makes me frown and who wants that?