Wednesday, April 02, 2003

It's Phair to say I'm a little disappointed...but I can see the silver lining.

I love Liz Phair. I still feel like an ass for the time I hit on her -- years and years ago -- and got shot down without even realizing it was her. Then I had to deal with the bartender laughing at me. Then my friends. Then everyone who I’ve told the stiry to since then (and no I’m not going into it here.) It especially stung since when I first heard Exile In Guyville I, along with 99% of the male indie population, pretty much pictured Ms. Phair as the perfect woman for me...one who could challenge me and be a general bad-ass yet was down with all the bedroom freakiness that runs through an early twenty-something's head. I loved Whip-Smart because I dug the poppier direction she was taking while still kicking it with the great lyrical twists. 

Whitechocolatespaceegg is where doubt began to settle in. First Ms. Phair went and got married and settled into the family life (though I always felt bad for her step-son...imagine being a teenager and having Liz-Fucking-Phair as your mom. You'd never sleep!) Then came the endless delays as the release date for the disc moved further and further back. And then came the disc itself. To be fair I still dig the album and actually felt like it was part of the logical progression of Ms. Phair's growing up. But the warning signs were there.

Then she sang back-up vocals on -- admittedly a pretty nice little tune but nevertheless -- a Sheryl Crow song. Then word filtered out that she was working with The Matrix production team a.k.a. the geniuses behind Avril Lavigne's current "world domination."

Now I've finally heard the album and can attest with all honesty that Liz has finally jumped the shark.

Shiny happy choruses abound and the lyrics are less than inspiring. She goes for an old "see I'm still shocking" joke with "Pure White Cum" The truth of the matter is that "joke" is probably the best song on the disc. That and a song about her underwear (extra props for using underwear as a metaphor for a lover...I actually thought that was pretty witty.

So critically the album's a stinker.

But I still like it. Why?

Well, for one Ms. Phair has made no pretense of not "going for broke" with this one. She's aiming for a super-duper Platinum selling type thing. Hell people, she's getting on in years and bills ain't gonna pay themselves! So the songs themselves are really catchy in that lowest common denominator way that usually leads to boffo album sales and usually these reasons wouldn't be enough for me but picture this: Ms. Phair's new album becomes the hit of the Junior High set and blasts from every teenager's convertible this summer. Then these kids, at least a few of them, go out and buy her previous albums and get turned on to her really good stuff. Sure, first they'll be confused wondering why this "Blowjob Queen" shares the same name as their current hero but then you just know they're going to get into it and actually discover something that speaks beyond a catchy hook and a super multi-tracked chorus, right?

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