Okay, time to sort through the massive piles of mail that have been virtually piling up here at Tankboy headquarters and answer the questions that have been burning holes through your cerebral cortex.
Q: I want to be your friend. What should I buy you?
A; Money can’t buy you love, but it can buy me. Also Little Debbie's Swiss Cake Rolls or Hostess Cupcakes. Yum!
Q: Is it fun to date Tankboy?
A: Let me answer your question with few questions of my own. Do you mind mental instability? Are you a licensed social-worker with a background in dealing with substance abuse? Do you enjoy finding automobiles in unlikely places like swimming pools and trees? Do you mind suffering mild to serious hearing loss? Do you enjoy it when someone corrects your English as a reflex action? Do you enjoy fried chicken but hate mushrooms? If all the above were answered with a resounding YES then you might find Tankboy fun to date.
Q: So are you some kind of crazed drug fiend?
A: Actually, and when I was younger I never thought I’d say something like this, but no. One could say Tankboy has outgrown most mind-altering substances. Except for booze. And cigarettes. And caffeine. But that’s it now, I swear!
Q: The third person thing. Drop it. It’s lame.
A: Tankboy will do his best to stop referring to himself in the third person.
Q: You know that whole, “It’s hot” thing? I ws watching The Simple Life and noticed Paris and Nicole say that a lot. Don’t you feel like a chump?
A: A chump? Not at all. I’m glad that a ctach-phrase I initiated has wored its way into the mainstream so quickly! I haven’t been this successful in getting my word out there since I coined “postal” as a verb in the early part of the last decade. Hurrah for Tankboy!
Q: Will you book my band?
A: I don’t know, are you good? I tend to book music I feel strongly about so I tend to use the same local bands over and over. Out-of-town bands that send me great discs, or whom I happen to catch live (like Shame Club last Saturday) usually end up getting approached by me to be put on a bill. It’s that simple. No hidden equations or back-room deal-making.
Q: Well, can you get us a show on October 13?
A: I’m working on it Aaron. If all else fails take that show at Elbo Room and I’ll find someone good to play with you.
Q: You talk about your dog a lot. Why?
A: I don’t have kids (that I know of) so Betty is my baby. And I’m glad we’ve expanded the family to include Lucy and Chloe the Cat as well. All three were strays at some point and all three are well and fully loved now…
Q: What are you listening to right now?
A: This second? Jimmy Eat World’s new disc Futures. Then it’ll either be Ricky Fante, The Twilight Singers or the new Mike Watt...depends.
Q: What happened to those mp3s you said you were going to start posting.
A: Well, the guy that was going to help out got a little nervous, understandably, about hosting copy written music in today big biz litigious society so until I can afford some server space of my own in the future (which ain’t happening any time soon since Tankboy is broke and in dept) you’ll just have to wait. I do love trading mix CDs so feel free to contact me for something like that…
Q: Did you give out all your Gmail invites?
A: Well, I did, but another popped back up. So who wants a Gmail invite and what’re you gonna give me for it?
Q: Sorry about your dad.
A: Thanks, me too. I think of him at the weirdest times and still really miss him. I have a feeling that’s how it’ll be for, oh, the next fifty years or so.
Q: Do you know any good jokes?
A: Watch me walk down the street with “attitude.” That’s pretty funny...
This is lame...
Totally, but I couldn't resist. Does that make me lame? Probably.
| T | Talented |
| A | Amazing |
| N | Nutty |
| K | Kind |
| B | Bold |
| O | Odd |
| Y | Young |
No comments:
Post a Comment