Realization is settling in.
Just so you know, this might be a boring read for anyone but me, but it's heavy on my mind so I feel the need to get it out.
So we're halfway through January which means I'm only about two weeks away from having to move everything out and into the new place. I've been going out a lot, and I realized that part of the reason is because I've been partially avoiding the reality of the situation. On one hand I'm really enjoying being single, and certainly won't deny that. But there is the undercurrent of realization that I'm cutting a lot of major ties with the person I really thought I was going to end up with, well, forever. And that can be rough.
We also both changed our profile status to single on the social networks we belong to, and I have to admit that felt a lot weirder than I thought it would. A few months ago I remember hearing a bartender talk to one of his friends about his own break-up, and I thought he was joking when he said, "Naw man, it's really over. I can tell because her MySpace says she's single and I'm no longer in her top friends." Now I realize there was a certain bittersweet truth in his statement. I hope I never see a reason to remove Photogal from my top friends though!
Yesterday I also realized just how much I'm going to miss living with Lucy the Dog and Chloe the Cat, especially since Lucy spent most of yesterday afternoon planted by my side with her head on my chest as I finished out watching the complete Twin Peaks. And then later, I found her and Betty the Beagle curled together in Betty's crate, something I have NEVER seen them do before, and I realized that Betty's going to miss Lucy an awful lot too. They'll still have doggy play-dates, but it just won't be the same. I'm glad Pickle the Kitten is coming with me though, since that's give Betty someone else to at least be around when I'm at work.
I guess I was able to mentally avoid the full impact of this by amping up the social side of my existence, but that front is beginning to hit a natural down-shift. I mean, you can only go out every other night for so long before you just mentally get drained by the whole thing. On the other hand, I've met scads of awesome new people, and have reconnected with a number of old friends, and through it all I've been having a blast. But the party always has to end sometime and I think I've hit that point.
And by that I don't mean I'm suddenly turning domestic, I simply mean that I no longer am feeling the drive to keep myself occupied with some sort of social endeavor every single night. And when I move into the new place I think I'm actually looking forward to staying in with movies, or catching up on the stack of books I have yet to read, or, of course, winnowing away that growing pile of old New Yorker magazines whose feature stories haven't been read.
Anyway, if you're still there, thanks for putting up with my prattling. This is one of those situations where I flip from bursting with excitement to being filled with dread, so it gets a little tricky at times. And, since you stuck around, I feel like I owe you a treat, so please enjoy the following selection from a local band that I think has a bright future. It's an early demo of a current audience favorite.
MP3: America's #1 Sweetheart "Drunken Sweethearts"
You can download more demos and album tracks from the band on their MySpace page. Hee!
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