Complications.

So, and I should have thought of this way earlier but I didn’t. I need turntables for this Thursday’s Chicagoist anniversary party. I guess I got so used to using my iPod or CDs I plumb forgot about folks spinning with vinyl. (Okay, that’s not true, but it does explain why I didn’t even think to ask our talented guest DJ what gear she needed for the evening.

So does anyone out there
have some turntables
we can borrow Thursday night?
I’ll buy you a few drinks for saving the day. I mean, if worse comes to worse, I’ll just rent ‘em, but since I’m promoting the show gratis that means I would actually lose money…and I’m not a rich man so I prefer it doesn’t come to that.

So, a little help? I swear I'm usually more prepared than this...

Also, it appears as if the mixer I had planned on using with guest DJs on Tuesday nights is no longer available so does anyone have any recommendations on where to get a reasonable dual CD mixer…preferably in the Chicago area?

Thanks.

What I learned.

Here's what I learned this weekend. In the past I would look forward to weekends Photogal was out of town because they gave me a chance to "cut loose" and get a little wild. Now when she leaves, I still cut loose but I realized, and this really hit home while I was talking to a mutual friend of ours, that I'm really just trying to take my mind off the fact that I miss her when she's not here. Really miss her. I mean, I tend to spend every night she's not here sleeping on the couch, with the TV on, just because it provides a distraction.

When did this happen to me?

Anyway, that was the main thing I learned this weekend. Some smaller lesson were absorbed as well, though, and they were:

• The new season (to us in the U.S.A.) of Footballers Wive$ looks to be a lot of fun.
  
• The Riverboat Gamblers show was tremendous fun and I actually really enjoyed seeing some old co-workers at The Note.
  
• The Chronicles of Narnia flick was better (and darker) than I expected. There were a few scenes where the kids were obviously and clumsily superimposed over a terribly cheesy backdrop, but the animation of most of the animals' coats of fur made up for those moments.
  
• Lucy the Dog might be the only person who misses Photogal more than I do, when Photogal is out of town. She would run up to the window every time she heard a metal gate in the neighborhood open or close...just in case it was Photogal coming up the steps. Lucy and I spent a lot of quality time together. We'll both be glad to see her return later today.

As promised...

...my preview of tonight's Riverboat Gamblers show. Be there. Seriously.

Now I've got to get to work...the weekend can't come quickly enough!

Blurtonia.

And here sans spell-check and only with the freshness a first draft can bring, I find myself in the early A.M. tap tap tapping away again. For your amusement. And. I suppose. Mine.

Later.

Right now all I want is truth. Basics. Where are you going with this Tankboy?

I don’t know. As usual.

Maybe that‘s it. That's what I'm going for. The realization that I really don't know for the most part. I'm fumbling along just like you and you and you. Right now I'm offered an opportunity though. Photogal is out of town for the next few days so I can either a) fall flat on my face, repeatedly, in a way that mimics the court jesters of yore or b) I can just be me, stand tall and flip out the most important of all middle digits to those who would hope/think/wish me otherwise or (and most probably) c) stand tall and combine jester with malcontent and gentleman and (basically) stay out of trouble while remaining as interesting as possible..

It's Thursday but it feels like Friday and I wish it was Saturday. Does that make me lazy? Or human? Or just, what? WHAT?

I dunno.

None of this makes any sense (or, actually, in fact (and so far – trust me – ) is this awkward (yes)) but it is grammatically correct. So I'm not completely unbalanced. Just a bit off, on the port side, and for that I feel guilty. Are you amused? I hope so. But just in case you're not, here's a tune. I wish I could say it encapsulates, in some lame generic worldview sort of way, my current state of mind…but it does not. Instead, it merely commits the (honorable (honourable (?))) crime of totally fucking rocking. So enjoy.

Download The Riverboat Gamblers "The Biz Loves Sluts" and then look for my preview, of their show right here in Chicago, tomorrow on Chicagoist.com.

"Kneel."
"Dennis!"

Spamalot was delightful. Even Photogal, who is no fan of Monty Python, thoroughly enjoyed herself. I thought they did a nice job of keeping the Python spirit going while still being able to create something the masses can enjoy. I was a teensy bit annoyed when fokks would applaud at the mere sight of a character before a bit had even started (i.e. the taunting Frenchmen) but I suppose that is to be expected. The only downside is that now I am really kicking myself for not having seen the show earlier with the original cast when it was in Chicago for its test run a few years ago!

P.S. Even the playbill was funny. Dik Od Triaanenen Fol indeed!

__________
Hip to be square?

In a hurry, as long weekends into a four-day work week have a tendency of totally screwing up one's schedule, so I would like to direct you to this particularly interesting article on sober scenesters. I got the tip-off about this via Tommie Sunshine's involvement in the piece and it certainly is an interesting read.

As long-time readers of mine know, I have swung from one end of the debauched spectrum clear into clean-and-sober land and then back again. Personally, at this point in my life, I like to live in a land somewhere in-between mostly being a responsible joe who occasionally turns into a rock and/or roller fueled by whiskey and beer. That's me though. And that's right now. Maybe tomorrow I'll never want to touch another drop, never smoke another cigarette and grow my own vegetables. Who can ever know for sure?

Folks that can maintain a clean lifestyle interest me since I honestly do have a hard time having bunches of fun at shows and parties when I'm stone-cold sober. I can still enjoy stuff like that, but there seems to be a certain "oomph" that's missing for me. I don't know if it's some sort of deficiency I have (probably) or what, but I can at least acknowledge that is how I feel.

Anyway, this isn't about me. Read the article and see that sometimes the really cool kids really do the most unexpected things.

My hero!

I want to meet the man who'll beat up a gator to save his puppy!

Let's slip into something more, um, comfortable.

It's Tuesday, but it feels like Monday, so I'm going to let a tune do all the work for me this morning. I love early Buzzcocks and, surprsingly, I like the neo-lounge of Nouvelle Vague. This cover of "Ever Fallen In Love" isn't quite as delightful of their re-working of "Bela Lugosi's Dead" but since that song has already made the rounds I reckon I should share something new. Enjoy.

Download Nouvelle Vague's take on Buzzcock's "Ever Fallen In Love."

Oofah.

Monday. Holiday. Sweat sweat sweating. Last night is mostly a (pleasurable) blur of bands exceding my expectations and a crowd that was rabidly receptive. I couldn't have asked for a better evening. And Photogal was pleased to see me actually cross our threshold pre-2am, although she was less than pleased to see me attempt to cook at that hour.

Remember, Tankboy, the rule is no stove or oven operation post-sundown.

Today is a blank slate. It's the only day in the past seven (or following seven) Photogal and I have no plans. BBQ anyone?

P.S. Photogal won the Spamalot tickets last Thursday. We see it tomorrow. My inner nerd is totally psyched. Monty Python and X-Men in the same week? Maybe it's time to toss Blade Runner into the ol' vid player...or maybe a couple eps of Buffy?

No. Brazil. That's it!

P.P.S. Yes, that picture features my pal Little Jim in a Battle Royale short. Yet another early morning hat-tip tp my inner nerd.

X-Men 3.

Ruled the school.

I was forced to take a vacation day from work, though I can think of mych better ways to spend a vacation day other than waiting for a tow-truck. Anyway, by the time I finally got my car to a garage I decided the only way to avenge my sacrifice was by going to see the new X-Men flick.

It totally pleased the comic fanboy in me. And stick around through to the end of the credits. I'll write more on it later but I reckon I don't want to ruin anything for people that haven't seen it yet.

What to do this Sunday:


Tankboy presents:
Sunday May 28 at Subterranean

The Textbook Committee (Guided By Voices tribute)
Farewell Captain (ex-Light FM)
The Venom Lords
LIVEAGE! (Descendents tribute)

Doors: 8:30pm
Show: 9:00pm
$7 admission
__________
Plus, bonus content before the the weekend.

This site is a hoot. I especially enjoyed their Twelve Steps To Blog Addiction Recovery (BAR).

DANCE PARTY!

Seriously, this picture says it all.


Photogal and I are DJing at Liar’s Club tonight and we would love it if you would join us. We start EARLY, at 8pm, because Time Out Chicago is hosting an event where they’ll be taste-testing Holy Grail Ale and giving away tickets to Monty Python's Spamalot. Awesome, huh? Full deets are:

TONIGHT
Thursday May 25
at
Liar’s Club

DJ Tankboy
DJ Cowbell

Beer, bourbon and mayhem.
We promise.

8pm until 2am
Get yer drink on and kick off the loooong weekend a day early.

__________
Five albums I just CAN NOT stop playing!

The Oohlas - Best Stop Pop:
Whoa, the '90s are back almost before we realized they were gone. Actually, this is the kind of music you would expect from bands that grew up on The Darling Buds and Magnapop and stuff like that. My only question is what am I going to have to do to get them to play here in Chicago?!

The Futureheads - News & Tributes:
I lurved the debut and while this one isn't quite knocking my block off the way they hit me the first time, it is doing a fair to excellent job of turning me on. The songs are (barely) longer, but they are by no means bloated. These lads are still the one-stop shop for when I want to get my XTC kink pogo party on.

Spank Rock - YoYoYoYoYo:
What is this? Rock? Rap? Borderline occasional glitch? NYC scenesters caught in an Indian wrestling match with some foul-mouthed sex-crazed MCs? Who the fuck cares? It's awesome fun!

The Riverboat Gamblers - To The Confusion Of Our Enemies:
I expect a backlash of "the new disc is too polished, I liked 'em better when they were punk as fuck" but to the negative nellies may I extend a big fat middle finger? The tunes are still a bundle of hyper-spazzed nerves, the only real difference is the singer is trying to sing instead of merely punctuating verses with yelps and howls.¹ The debut kicked ass, but this one takes names.

The Ark - State Of The Ark:
Why? They satisfy my penchant for all things Bowie with their affected glam circa Shudder To Think's digging of the Velvet Goldmine.

¹Yes, that worked for David Yow, but believe me when I say Yow was one in a trillion.

Pandora's box.

So, what with Pandora being selected as one of the best music sites on the web, I reckoned it was time to see if it could surprise this old music snob and provide me with any delightful selections based on tunes or artists I already knew I liked. I decided to start it off easy with an older tune that was sure to have lots of cross-referenced matching-type stuff going for it. Plus, it’s got a good beat and you can dance to it. So...

MY SELECTION WAS:
What A Fool Believes by: The Doobie Brothers

THEY CAME UP WITH:
Thank You For Being A Friend by: Andrew Gold - Yes!
Coming Home by: Bryan Adams - What the - ?
Walking On Broken Glass by: Annie Lennox - Oh no, it just keeps getting worse.
No Time For Talk by: Christopher Cross - Kill me now!
Heart Hotels by: Dan Fogelberg - NOOOOoooOOOOO!
Missed Opportunity by: Hall & Oates - Better, though I can't believe it took five songs to make the Yacht Rock connection!
See The Lights by: Simple Minds - Okay, I'm shutting this down NOW.

Hmmm…that didn’t go so well. Let’s try for something a little more easily categorized as straight-ahead pop.

MY SELECTION WAS:
Chewing Gum by: Annie

THEY CAME UP WITH:
My Best Friend by: Annie - Well, duh.
In A Vacuum by: Amy X Neuburg - Hmm...sounds like watered down Madonna and that's not doing it for me.
Twist by: Goldfrapp - Now that's more like it.
As I Lay Me Down by: Sophie B. Hawkins - I could grimace, but this selection actually brought a smile to my face. I guess context really does count for something. Oh wait, I'm a DJ, I knew that already! Can Wilson Phillips be far behind?
Radio Romance by: Tiffany - Up until the synths, this could have almost been a DFA 1979 song. After the synths, um, okay...fast forward.
Boy Toy by: Gentlemen Of Leisure - Honestly, I've never heard this song. And in the context of an "Annie" station I'm actually digging it. It reminds me of a more languid Pet Shop Boys.
Beauty And The Beast by: Peabo Bryson & Celine Dion - OH SWEET BABY JESUS, WHY DO YOU HATE ME? MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!

MY SELECTION WAS:
David Bowie

THEY CAME UP WITH:
Sound And Vision by: David Bowie - Excellent first choice.
Ships In The Night by: Be Bop Deluxe - Okay, cool. Kind of "Cars Lite."
Another Nail For My Heart by: Squeeze - You can't really go wrong with Squeeze.
Time Will Crawl by: David Bowie - Okay, we already established I like Bowie, right?
Hot In The City by: Billy Idol - The man's abs are timeless...this song is not.
Don't Fight It by: Tom Cochrane & Red Rider - Call me a music snob, but this is the sort of thing I would dismiss immediately. And that's why being a snob is a losing proposition. Because this song is a rather delightful slice o' pop.
History Never Repeats by: Split Enz - Okay, obviously Pandora has Bowie pegged in the '80s. To be fair I tried his name Monday and Pandora picked a Tin Machine song and then thrust me in the middle of the grunge movement...so with someone as slippery as Bowie I suppose it's best to go in with a particular type of song.
Win by: David Bowie - Isn't this supposed to be directing me towards Bowie-ish songs? Not Bowie songs"
Beast Of Burden by: The Rolling Stones - I guess sleeping with Bowie gets you into the rotation, huh?

Well, that was sort of a dud as far as opening me up to new tunes, though I did dig that Tom Cochrane & Red Rider song, but it did provide me with enough pseudo-Bowie sounding stuff to keep me happy.

Okay, one more.

MY SELECTION WAS:
Pretty Fucked Up by: The Supersuckers

THEY CAME UP WITH:
The Revisionist by: The Lawrence Arms - I didn't get this selection until the guitars kicked in. Then I totally got it. Not gut-busting...but it is catchy as hell.
Granola-Head by: The Queers - Hee hee. Haven’t heard this one before. Pretty funny.
I Wish Somebody Would Build A Bridge (So I Can Get Over Myself) by: Thirsty Merc - This totally apes the guitar intro, explodey chorus thingie so I'm digging it.
Promise by: Matchbook Romance - Ack! What is this?! No bueno!
Overheated by: Lawrence Arms - A little slicker than the earlier Lawrence Arms track, not as good...but still not too bad. A little generic perhaps.
California by: Hawk Nelson - So I'm becoming afraid...Pandora is veering further and further into Mall-rock territory. Not cool.
Sea Ghost by: The Unicorns - Whew, talk about coming back from the precipice!
Sloop John B by: Me First And The Gimme Gimmes - Ugh, this is funny, and a guilty pleasure indeed...but we're back to the Mall-punk.
Bad Scene, Everyone's Fault by: Jawbreaker - okay I'm ending here on an up note.

Okay, overall I get Pandora’s vibe, but she’s not really doing it for me. Also I would shudder to think some fresh-faced new music lover would use this for reliable recommendations of artists similar to their faves.

I think I’ll stick with reading about music, talking about music, trading mix CDs with friends and checking out DJs…it’s not quite time for HAL to guide my taste. But I think it will be soon. We’ll see...

When auld acquaintance be revisited.

I will be in San Diego June 23 until June 25.

I have never, believe it or not, been on the East¹ West Coast. Wild, but true! I’m heading out there to attend a conference and stuff my brain full of information for the jobby-job. It should be really informative and I think it will be great to interact with the other folks attending the conference.

Another reason I’m excited is that I have some old old old friends who live in San Diego. One of them drew the picture this picture.


His name is Tim Bradstreet. He used me as a model for that cute little Frankenstein’s monster you see me portraying. Personally I had always hoped he’d use me as a sexy vampire, but once I found out they were coming out with an action figure based on my little Frankenstein guy I felt a lot better. I mean, how often do you get an action figure made to look like you?! Awesome.

Tim’s wife is Missy Bradstreet and I’ve known her even longer than I’ve known Tim. I DJed their wedding and have only seen them a handful of times since then so I’m hoping they can carve a little time out of their busy newly parenting schedule so I get a chance to catch up a little.

My friend Jimmy lives there too. He’s a handful of trouble but I’m hoping to see him as well. Assuming of course that he doesn’t try to convince he’s dying from some tumor or some rare cancer he has self-diagnosed.

My old roommate Leslie lives there as well and so far she’s the only one I’ve heard back from so I know I’ll see her. It’ll be lots of fun to catch up since I think a lot has gone on in each of our lives since we last lived together.

So that brings me to this: Does anyone who reads this live out that way? Any suggestion on what I should try and do while I’m there? I mean, I will have a very limited amount of free time (primarily Friday and Saturday evenings) but any advice would be welcome. Even something as simple as how to get around town, given the chance, would be cool.

__________
Riffing on a familiar theme.

Tonight Rudy and I will be spinning at The Pontiac. This is not new. We will be joined by guest DJs from Farewell Captain (Mark Ruggiero) and The Venom Lords (Gina Knapik) as they share their exquisite tastes with us. This is new! Both folks are playing a big Tankboy Memorial Day show this Sunday so drop on by to say hi to them and pledge your attendance in advance.

¹Thanks to everyone who reminded me San Diego is on the West Coast, not the East. I look doubly stupid since I (as my little brother pointed out) used to live on the East Coast!

Marvel at this...

My eyes almost popped right out of my head (and other cliches) whilst reading this treatise on emo in yesterday's Trib that paints the paper as being hopelessly out of touch. Quick, hide the kids...it's emo!

Loverboy (as in EWFTW!)

Ah, it is Friday Friday Friday. Photogal is leaving town for the weekend, which leaves me with nothing to do but have tea parties with my teddy bears and maybe (hope hope hope!) I'll even get a little knitting done.

Aw, who am I kidding?

Last time Photogal was out off town I managed to lock myself out of the house for two hours, at 3in the AM, before I finally realized one of our windows was unlocked. The time before that was New Year's Eve and I have no idea how I got home; only that I woke up on my own couch with two dogs using me as a bed. The time before that...well, you get the idea. This will officially be a "Don't become a Whiskey-soaked Tankboy and make an ass of yourself, Tankboy" weekend. Sound good? Good.

I know I will be at innjoy (a.k.a. ye olde stomping grounds of yore¹) tonight to see DJs Yin and yang tear it up. It has been months since I've actually been to innjoy (come to think of it, Skid and Dave were DJing the last time I was there and Dave’s wife has had a baby since then so it has been a while) and I’m really looking forward to hear what these guys are going to pull out. usually I would go to Cobra if I had a Friday all free and clear to get all drunky-pants like I will tonight, but Rudy took the night off to see The Twilight Singers and, I'm sorry guys, but Cobra just ain't worth it for me if Rudy's not there. So innjoy it is.

Tomorrow is a bit of a mystery though. i have no idea what's going on and even less idea of what I'll be doing so feel free to hit me with suggestions, comments, bribes and offers of free booze in exchange for my scintillating company.

And finally, since I am still working on a mix o' wunnerful music to share with all of you, I will leave you with these two short documentaries upon which to waste a few minutes of (for you nine-to-fivers) the last day of the work-week. To everyone else, just waste a few minutes whenever.

So go see this:

Geeks and nerds? that doesn't sound like anything I want to be a part of. Ladies in sci-fi skimpy outfits? That sounds like EVERYTHING I want to be a part of! Ladies in skimpy outfits should be hanging out with me!

And then see this:

The Easter Bunny totally hates you. He looks nothing like I imagined.

And hopefully I will see you out this weekend so you can buy me a drink!

¹I know it's a redundant phrase but I'm employing for comedic effect. If you're reading this footnote the juxtaposition of "olde" and "yore" obviously failed to be viewed thusly.

On kissing and life.

Here’s the thing: I am a really good kisser.

I think I can probably credit (and a number of folks can thank) my high school chum Lisa Arthur for this simple fact. And to be honest I had kind of forgotten about it until recently when Photogal and I were making out – we may be old but we can still get hot-n-heavy so cover your eyes, kids – and I realized what a superb kisser she is and how lucky I was to have found such a naturally gifter partner. When you get so much of a good thing, sometimes you forget just how unique it can be, no?

Now kissing is a funny thing. Anyone can do it and, to be honest, most folks do a fine job of it. It’s not until you meet a fabulous smoocher, or a slobbery awful smacker, that you really understand what a really good kiss is like.

So with that in mind, and looking back to how popular my dating tips were a while ago, I feel it’s time to impart my wisdom on this touchiest of subjects. If you listen to my words closely, you too can be a fabulous kisser.

Ready? Here it comes. The wisest words of wisdom you will hear (in the next two seconds.)

It’s not a sword fight.

Okay, there is more to it than that, but goddamned if that isn’t the first and most important lesson to knock through your noggin. It’s a lesson that actually can be expanded to encompass a whole raft of issues, actually. I mean, how much time to do waste railing away at situations trying to change shit that a) you can’t change and b) isn’t really all that bad in the first place. I was reminded of this, and my own fallibility, by something (it doesn’t matter what) the other day. Let’s just say someone was trying to mess with my mojo and I, being the over thinker that I am, spent lots of time erecting defenses against this individual that ended up being totally unnecessary. If I had taken a lesson from my own mouth and lets things develop naturally then I could have saved myself a lot of fretting and fuming.

Even now, sitting here and in full knowledge of how things actually worked out I can’t help but get worked up about the spent emotion I totally wasted. Hold on. I’ve got to cool down for a sec.

I’ll be right back, I’m going to try my own advice and go smooch Photogal and see if that helps at all.

Well, erm, it helped me but she sure seemed annoyed. I guess not everyone likes having a stubbbly face rubbing all over their face at some ungodly pre-sun hour of the morning. Maybe I should have stuck that stubbly chin elsewhere.

Oh my. Where was I? Oh yeah.

So, kissing as an allegory for level-headedness and tolerance; Is that where I was going? I think so.

Okay, I’ve spent a large number of years negotiating deals between many difficult parties. When I promote shows part of my job is to make things flow and act as a buffer (to a certain extent) between band/club/audience. Maybe my natural predilection for kissery is what has made me so suited to this sort of work. I mean, a good kiss is equal parts natural ability and gentle focus, right? How is that any different from booking a show? Or, for that matter, any other endeavor?

I’m struggling here, and this is not uncommon for me when I’m trying to state something that I imagine so clearly and simply. These concepts are often the most difficult to put down without coming off as cliché. Cliché has its place, but just because a generic phrase rings true that doesn’t actually make it so. And how much more generic can one get than A kiss is just a kiss or Go with the flow, right? But at the heart of it, isn’t that sort of what I’m just trying to say here?

But it’s not just that. My point about kissing isn’t just “let nature take over.” I think the mantra would more appropriately be “trust nature to take over.” There is a difference. So maybe it’s not as cliché as “go with the flow.” Maybe it’s as cliché as “trust in life (a higher power? karma? whatnot?) to get you through.”


Whatever. I totally failed to make the point I was aiming for. I’m going to quit jawing away and stick this chin where it might do some good.

Oh my, indeed.

Ta.

Today’s photos were shamelessly stolen from here, here, here, here and here. I met this guy that took this picture Tuesday and he seems awfully swell. Check out some of his music.

__________
PSA, or sorts.

My dear dear friend and DJ partner, Mister Rudy "Midnight Shows" Tuesday, is going on a month(-ish) long sabbatical to finally foment and cement his newest musical endeavor (read: band.) Look for guest DJs¹ to be at my side over the next few weeks as we count the seconds until his rebirth/return. Also, look for said new musical project chez Rudy to debut at The Pontiac on June 29. This evening also happens to be, quite coincidentally, the same night as my annual birthday celebration at said venue. I will be notching another major tick on the cellular clock at midnight that evening (read: at the stroke of June 30.)

Be sure to keep your calendars clear that evening.

¹Interested in spinning and think you have what it takes? E-mail me and let me know.

Fuck Jim and Pam.

I'm beginning to think Dwangela is where it's at.

No, this is not a Photoblog.

Whatever the hell that is. You might think so considering the amount of images vs. words that have been popping up at this particular address lately. I mean I have friends who have sites that prominently feature their fine photography (and come to think of it, wouldn't it be nice if Photogal set up something like that?) and that is all fine and dandy, but it ain't me.

No, when you start seeing lots of pictures from me it a) probably means I'm just trying to archive them in a central spot or b) trying to share them with friends and/or various voyeuristic interested parties or (most likely, usually) c) I got up too late to really write anything worthwhile and I only had time to put up a few photos while waiting for my coffee to be ready.

So without further delay let's kick things off with a picture of Kip from Friday night.


And, since I really would like to keep this site somewhat in touch with current events, allow me to share this misguided piece of fancy that appeared on the AOL home page last week. Seriously, did you ever seriously consider either of these two to ever be singers? I didn't think so.


Now, I was about to post another baby picture from yet another friend, and I will sooner or later, but is it just me or are babies popping up like poppies all around me? Seriously. Oh wait, that's right...I'm old and most folks have already had kids by now. My friends are just beginning to fall in line. Does this mean I should start having unprotected sex?¹ Yah yah yaaaaah!

Okay. Spiraling out. So let's wrap this up with this. I think it speaks for itself. Or maybe it doesn't.² I'll just leave it at that. Ta.


¹I told you I wasn't in any shape to actually write first thing this morning, so sorry about that.
²Sorry it's out of focus. Chatman took it and I'm pretty sure he was plowed past the point of negotiating a camera's focus by this time.

Exploiting a friend's baby for fun and profit.*


WHA' HAPPEN'?!
I'll tell you what...

TONIGHT!

DJs Tankboy & Rudy Tuesday
are cuter than a baby's bottom
and twice as smooth.

Old school rock and/or roll attitude
mixed with only the finest selections
from yesterday, today and tomorrow.

TONIGHT, Tuesday May 16, 2006
Stunning musical selections from 9pm until 2am

$2.00 Point Beer
$2.50 PBR

Come see why nine out of ten Baby Evils
chose us as their preferred DJs.
_______________________________

The Pontiac
1531 N Damen
Chicago, IL
773.252.7767

*If your friend's baby made a face that awesome, you'd want to capitalize on it as well. Thanks for letting me use your likeness JB (a.k.a. Baby Evil)!

Dagnabbit!

Guess whose car broke down and decided to stop running, in the ghetto, on the way home from work last Friday? Guess who's going to attempt to limp to a mechanic in his car in about ten minutes, hoping against hope that it's the transmission since that's still under warranty. Guess who suspects that all of this is less than compelling for anyone other than himself so he's not exatcly sure why he's typing this in the first place?

Guess who hopes you notice the proper use of "whose" versus "who's" since, at the very least, if you have learned something new(-ish) you won't have completely wasted the last minute you spent reading this.